Maybe you don’t realize one thing: Today’s men and women, especially those in first- and second-tier cities, their biggest rival in intimate relationships is not games or peers, but their potential career ambitions.
I don’t know if you have discovered such an interesting phenomenon:
Those young people who really don’t want to fall in love Men and women, it’s really not that they can’t find them. These people often have outstanding looks and economic strength among their peers. The only characteristic of these people is that they are busy every day and have clear plans for their lives.
The reason why these people don’t want to fall in love is, to put it bluntly, “the current personal strength is not worthy of their own vision”, so they just want to spend time and money on improving themselves.
Really, you will be surprised to find that these people have a very Buddhist attitude towards relationships, and love is actually a dispensable existence for them at this stage. And they rarely take the initiative in relationships, even if they are single, it doesn't matter - because these people are extremely ambitious and are busy competing with themselves at a young age.
In the eyes of others, these people may look like unusual "chicken thieves", but from a certain perspective, this is also a manifestation of rationality.
To fall in love, you need to spend time getting along, spending money and energy to maintain the relationship. If you are not worth much, then most of the opposite sex you can match will not be what you want.
It’s not a loss if you really take the step of marriage. But if this relationship really ends without a problem, then it is not only the relationship, but also the sunk capital of several years of time and money.
Therefore, many young people wisely realize that "I spent the time in dating on improving myself, and the benefits I gained later were far more cost-effective than investing in the relationship."
Boys should no longer work hard to make money and improve their social status during the time when they should not be struggling. Even if there is a girl who is willing to talk to you, but In the end, if you can't even come up with the down payment for a house, what are the chances that your parents will agree to marry their daughter to you?
During the time when girls no longer have to struggle, they can improve their aesthetics and enhance their own Emotional intelligence and knowledge, even if there is a boy who is willing to talk with you, in the end, when faced with an arrogant, domineering and unsophisticated person like you, how many boys are willing to regard you as a lifelong marriage partner?
Our traditional intimate relationships in the past all emphasized that "two people should get married as early as possible, and then have a few children as soon as possible, so that they can be protected when they grow old." Therefore, the older generation does not need to say that they are thirty years old. , Twenty-six people are considered a high-risk group if they don’t have a target.
But in fact, if we think about it carefully and compare it with reality, we will understandRealizing that according to the past marriage and love model, the feasibility for modern men and women is very low:
You must know that love and marriage are no longer necessary for young people. Propagating the family line is not the primary task of marriage for contemporary young people.
Today’s society is so competitive, and young people must face a lot of pressure in such a society. Therefore, many young people spontaneously realize that "Only by working hard to build yourself first can you not fall behind in the times. Only by improving your personal value can your marriage and love relationship be stable and long-lasting."
And the goal is clear , highly motivated men and women, who have strong self-esteem and self-love, and do not want to fall into a relationship that is physically and mentally exhausting - they still have project bonuses waiting to earn, certificates waiting to take exams, and... There are plenty of personal pursuits waiting to be achieved.
An outstanding young man who continues to add value spends more time and energy on himself than on other things.
Those who are willing to spend all their young time and money on love, based on my experience in the industry for nearly six years, the final outcome is often tragic.
Those who really stand out after the age of 28 and become a rarity in the marriage and love market are currently working on projects in front of the computer, or They are busy enriching themselves through various channels. Even if some people do not have any lofty ambitions, they are still working hard to take the postgraduate and public examinations and find a stable way out for the rest of their lives.
Do these people not want to fall in love? Or are these people naturally frigid?
No, it is because these people understand the essence of sexual relations. What kind of person you can meet and what kind of person will choose you are actually closely related to that person's personal value.
Rather than not being chosen when you are not capable, it is better to give it a try and wait until your strength and value are strong before matching with the opposite sex. There will be many choices and the probability of being rejected will also increase. become smaller.
It’s not that these people don’t know that youth is a bonus period for love, but it’s just that these people have a longer-term perspective and have a clearer sense of their own positioning.
Compared with having an immature relationship when you are young, it is better to wait until you are stable and mature, and your personal value has transcended levels, and then directly find a well-matched and evenly matched person to have a relationship without breaking up. love.
Therefore, for most people, the ex and the inability to find a suitable partner are only a small part of the influencing factors, and they are just excuses to declare to the outside world.
The real reason why these people don’t want to fall in love is simply that their current personal value is not worthy of their ambitions.
These people may be what everyone calls straight men and straight women, and occasionally they jokingly call them "singles", but these peopleThose who are truly motivated and self-disciplined know that "victory in the battle of marriage and love is no longer twenty, but thirty."
What people pursue is not vigorous and painful. A heartfelt love, but a stable, long-lasting and equal marriage.
Regardless of whether you are a man or a woman, when a person has a local household registration, a car and a house, and enough savings to withstand risks, and is financially independent without having to pay for marriage, such a person will be put into marriage. In the market, why worry about being without a wife and a husband?
This problem is really not as complicated and sad as you think.
